Frases de Jasper Fforde

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“No te creas a quien te diga que el futuro ya está escrito. Lo mas que puede hacer un profeta es ofrecerte la versión más probable de los futuros acontecimientos, pero depende de nosotros aceptar el futuro tal y como es, o cambiarlo. Es fácil dejarse llevar por la corriente, pues para nadar en contra hay que ser muy valiente.”

“Pero Mu'shad Waseed, aunque es muy buen mago, no tiene en todo el cuerpo ni una centésima parte del poder que yo tengo en el dedo meñique del pie.
-¡Os he oído! -le dijo Mu'shad Waseed (…)-. ¡Enseñadme ese meñique vuestro tan poderoso!
Pero en lugar de mostrarle a Mu'shad Waseed el dedo del pie, lo que hizo el Poderoso Shandar fue inclinarse ante él, tanto que incluso rozó el suelo con la frente, y decirle, con voz cargada de respeto y veneración:
-Bienvenido a mi humilde palacio, muy honorable Mago del Imperio Persa, señor de los vientos y de las mareas, conocido en sus dominios como El que es capaz de aplacar a Tamsin.
-¿No querrá usted decir jamsin? ¿Ese viento seco y cálido que sopla habitualmente en la Península Arábiga?
-Si hubiera querido decir jamsin, hubiera dicho jamsin. Tamsin era la segunda esposa de Mu'shad Waseed. Una mujer espantosa, espantosa de verdad. Su amor por las cosas brillantes y la ropa cara, y su costumbre de bañarse en leche de coneja, hicieron retroceder e feminismo por lo menos cuatro siglos.”

“Bienvenido a Kazam (…), donde los horrores más inimaginables comparten el día a día con la perplejidad absoluta y el azar más rabioso. Definirlo como manicomio sería un insulto hasta para el más desquiciado de los manicomios.”

“Las premoniciones se cumplen porque la gente quiere que se cumplan. Un observador siempre cambia el resultadi de un acontecimiento; millines de observadores, como en este caso, lo garantizan.”

“Eso es lo malo de las premoniciines, que tienen la molesta costumbre de hacerse realidad.”

“Intentamos que el arte sea perfecto porque en la vida real jamás lo logramos”

“We all make mistakes at some time in our lives, some more than others. It is only when the cost is counted in human lives that people really take notice.”

“That's the thing about destiny: It can't be predicted, and it's usually pretty odd.”

“Defiance through compliance.”

“What’s the opposite of déjà vu, when you see something that hasn’t happened yet?”

“I don’t know—avant verrais?”

“I got Oedipus off the incest charge--technicality, of course--he didn't know it was his mother at the time.”

“He was, after all, the ultimate rebel -- it takes a lot of cojones to stand up to Zeus.”

“Sometimes choice is a luxury that fate does not afford us.”

“Apart from the faint odor of ink that pervaded the scene, it might have been real.”

“… the landscape inside Lord of the Rings was so stunning and so stupendous that it could be absorbed as a form of nourishment.”

“There are a lot of idiots in this country, and they deserve representation as much as the next man.”

“If it's a chimera alert, we just follows the screams.”

“The neanderthal experiment was simultaneously the high and low point of the genetic revolution. Successful in that a long-dead cousin of Homo sapien was brought back from extinction, yet a failure in that the scientists, so happy to gaze upon their experiments from their ever lofty ivory towers, had not seen so far as to consider the social implications that a new species of man might command in a world unvisited by their like for over 30 millennia. It was little surprise that so many neanderthals felt confused and unprepared for the pressures of modern life. It was Homo sapien at his least sapient.”

“Edward, Edward," he said with a patronising smile, "there are no unanswered questions of any relevance. Every question that we need to ask has been answered fully. If you can't find the correct answer then you are obviously asking the wrong question.”

“Miss Havisham had told me about Generics. They were created here in the Well to populate the books that were to be written. At the point of creation they were simply a human canvas without paint - blank like a coin, ready to be stamped with individualism. They had no history, no conflicts, no foibles - nothing that might make them either readable or interesting in any way. It was up to various institutions to teach them to be useful members of fiction. They were graded, too. A to D, one through ten. Any that were D-graded were like worker bees in crowds and busy streets. Small speaking parts were C-grades; B-grades usually made up the bulk of featured but not leading characters. These parts usually -but not always- went to the A-grades, handpicked for their skills at character projection and multidimensionality.”