Frases de Ambrose Bierce

“Un hombre es como un árbol: En un bosque de sus iguales crecerá tan recto como su naturaleza individual y genérica lo permita; solo en campo abierto, cede a las tensiones y torsiones deformantes que lo rodean.”

“Si deseas que tus sueños se hagan realidad… ¡despierta!”

“No hay nada nuevo bajo el sol, ¡pero cuántas cosas viejas hay que no conocemos!”

“Un egoísta es una persona que piensa más en sí misma que en mi.”

“Oportunidad: una ocasión favorable para idear una decepción.”

“Futuro: Periodo de tiempo en el que prosperan nuestros negocios, nuestros amigos son verdaderos y nuestra felicidad segura.”

“Hay sonidos que no podemos oir. A ambos lados de la escala hay notas que no estimulan cuerda alguna de ese imperfecto instrumento, el oído humano”

“El ojo humano es un instrumento imperfecto; si rango de de unas cuantas octavas de la 'escala cromática' real. No estoy loco; hay colores que no podemos ver. Y, ¡que Dios me ayude!, la Maldita Cosa es de uno de esos colores!.”

“Contra el hambre y la sed no teníamos defensa. Valor teníamos, pero la esperanza era sólo un recuerdo.”

“Con extender un brazo cualquiera de ellos podría haber tocado al octavo hombre, que yacía sobre la mesa, boca arriba, parcialmente cubierto con una sábana, sus brazos extendidos a sus lados. Estaba muerto.”

“El hombre que tenía el libro no estaba leyendo en voz alta, y nadie hablaba; todos parecían esperar a que ocurriera algo; sólo el muerto no esperaba nada.”

“Camino, s. Faja de tierra que permite ir de donde uno está cansado a donde es inútil ir.”

“Gravitación, s. Tendencia de todos los cuerpos a acercarse unos a otros con fuerza proporcional a la cantidad de materia que contienen; la cantidad de materia que contienen se determina por la tendencia a acercarse unos a otros. Bello y edificante ejemplo de cómo la ciencia, después de hacer de A la prueba de B, hace de B la prueba de A.”

“A veces era un oso, a veces un antílope, un coyote, un puma, lo que Dios quisiera, todo era comida.”

“Felicidad: una agradable sensación que surge de la contemplación de la miseria de otro.”

“Guerra: Desatar con los dientes un nudo político que no se puede deshacer con la lengua.”

“Pintura: El arte de proteger la superficie plana de los daños del clima para exponerla a los daños de la crítica.”

“Política: Conducción de los asuntos públicos para el provecho de los particulares.”

“Citas: una manera de repetir erróneamente las palabras de otro.”

“Un cobarde es una persona en la que el instinto de conservación aún funciona con normalidad.”

“Una mujer sería encantadora si uno pudiera caer en sus brazos sin caer en sus manos.”

“Los soldados ríen con facilidad en los intervalos de la batalla, y una broma en la cámara de ejecuciones conquista por sorpresa.”

“¡Esa Maldita Cosa!”

“Al principio creí que se había vuelto loco, pero al regresar a casa no encontré ninguna alteración en su conducta excepto la que se debía claramente al miedo de ser castigado.”

“¿Puede un perro ver con su nariz? ¿Acaso los olores llevan a algún centro del cerebro imágenes de la cosa que los emitió?….”

“¡Es terrible, insostenible! Si estas increíbles experiencias son reales me volveré loco; si son fantasías es que ya lo estoy.”

“No me iré, no me hará escapar. No, esta es mi casa, mi tierra. Dios odia a los cobardes…”

“Tengo la solución del misterio; se me ocurrió anoche, de repente, como una revelación. ¡Qué simple, qué terriblemente simple!”

“Cualquiera puede contar algún tipo de historia; la narración es uno de los poderes elementales de la raza. Pero el talento para la descripción es raro.”

“Lo que había frente a nosotros no podía ser peor que lo que habíamos dejado atrás.”

“An army's bravest men are its cowards. The death which they would not meet at the hands of the enemy they will meet at the hands of their officers, with never a flinching.”

“Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder. This disease is prevalent only among civilized races living under artificial conditions; barbarous nations breathing pure air and eating simple food enjoy immunity from its ravages. It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than to the patient.”

“Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.”

“Faith, n. Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel.”

“Dawn: When men of reason go to bed.”

“Circus, n. A place where horses, ponies and elephants are permitted to see men, women and children acting the fool.”

“Peyton Fahrquhar was dead; his body, with a broken neck, swung gently from side to side beneath the timbers of the Owl Creek bridge.”

“Non-combatant, n. A dead Quaker.”

“Idiot, n. A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in human affairs has always been dominant and controlling. The Idiot's activity is not confined to any special field of thought or action, but "pervades and regulates the whole." He has the last word in everything; his decision is unappealable. He sets the fashions and opinion of taste, dictates the limitations of speech and circumscribes conduct with a dead-line.”

“Hidden in hollows and behind clumps of rank brambles were large tents, dimly lighted with candles, but looking comfortable. The kind of comfort they supplied was indicated by pairs of men entering and reappearing, bearing litters; by low moans from within and by long rows of dead with covered faces outside. These tents were constantly receiving the wounded, yet were never full; they were continually ejecting the dead, yet were never empty. It was as if the helpless had been carried in and murdered, that they might not hamper those whose business it was to fall to-morrow.”

“The covers of this book are too far apart.”

“Quotation, n. The act of repeating erroneously the words of another. The words erroneously repeated.”

“One thing, however, I hope I may without offense affirm of these swamp-dwellers--they were pious. To what deity their veneration was given--whether, like the Egyptians, they worshiped the crocodile, or, like other Americans, adored themselves, I do not presume to guess.”

“n. Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.”

“Egotist, n. A person of low taste, more interested in himself than in me.”

“Patience, n. A minor form of despair, disguised as a virtue.”

“All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.”

“Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.”

“Pray, v. To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled in behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.”

“Cynic, n. A blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be. Hence the custom among the Scythians of plucking out a cynic's eyes to improve his vision.”

“Ocean, n. A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man — who has no gills.”

“Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.”

“Scriptures, n. The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.”

“Corporation, n. An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility.”

“Education, n. That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding.”

“Apologize, v. To lay the foundation for a future offense.”

“In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.”

“A benighted creature who has the folly to worship something he can see and feel.”

“Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.”